IDIOTS OF THE WEB - VOLUME 10

This is by far one of the most ignorant things I've seen written since I read the lyrics to the last Poison CD. This calls for an Idiots Of The Web post.

I will say this isn't from Dope's official website, even though it is from www.EdselDope.com. I guess it's a fan site, though the chick does know the guys in Dope and I wouldn't be suprised if Edsel had something to do with this. It's from http://www.edseldope.com/tourbus.html.

Anyway, you're not going to believe this:

Okay, everyone knows about the bus problems that Dope has had over the last couple of tours. Well, we here at EDSELDOPEdotCOM have decided that it's up to us, the fans, to ensure that our boys have a safe, comfortable, reliable bus to travel in. So, we've started the "Buy Dope A New Tour Bus" fundraising campaign. All we ask is that you click the button below to make a secure payment, through PayPal to add to the fund. Donate as much or as little as you want. All donations are appreciated.

Once the campaign is complete and we have the money to buy the bus, we will present a check to the boys of Dope for the full amount that was collected through donations.

If you do not have a PayPal account, do not like making online payments, etc., you can still help out my sending a personal check, money order or cashier's check. Just click here to e-mail me and let me know what you want to do. I will give you the hook up so you can help us out as well.

Also, to go along with all of this, we've also decided to create the "We Bought Dope A New Bus" scrapbook. Everyone who makes a donation can send along a personal message and a picture, anything you want to say to the boys, and it will all be compiled into the scrapbook which will be presented to Dope along with the check. So, when you make your donation, be sure to e-mail me with a picture and/or a personal message for the guys. (Or if you want your donation to be anonymous, that is cool too. No pressure.)

So, think about it and reach deep into your pockets, check books, credit cards, whatever . . . And help us get a new bus for the greatest fucking band to ever exist.

If ignorance were a disability, whoever wrote this should get a full pension.

You're asking fucking fans to buy Dope a Tour Bus!? You actually want people to donate their money so Dope can ride around in a fucking tour bus? Is that what I just read? You want Dope to be comfortable and to be able to watch DVDs and be driven around the country like rock stars simply because they can't afford to get their own bus? You want them to be comfortable and not have to ride in a van or something, right? What type of fucking scam is this? Of all the places somebody could donate money to in this world, you have the balls to ask people to pitch in money so Dope can ride around in a Tour Bus? Fuck donating money to cancer or AIDS research, or to the homeless, or saving the planet, or whatever cause you want to donate money to! We need to get Dope a tour bus!!!! There's not enough crack in the entire world to make this sound like a good idea.

Even Slaughter and Dana Strum didn't out right ask fans to donate money for a tour bus. They just found rich fans and kept it all on the downlow.

Anyway, I have an idea, why not you go fuck yourself instead? Dope can go tour in a van or a station wagon like all the other bands in the world. I'd give you an F.U. Award if my brain could have handle the information that I just read.

If Edsel Dope had any clue he would tell this chick and what fans Dope has left to not do this, because it ain't going to make him look any good. Riding in a tour bus is a luxury you should have to earn, not have your fucking fans buy for you!!! How pathetic. Most bands will never get to ride in a tour bus, but they still tour year round. They're out there in vans, stations wagons, horse & buggy, canoe, whatever it takes to make a show. If you're in a band and you can't afford a nice tour bus, boo-fucking-hoo!!! That's the way it fucking goes and if you can't hang, then you don't belong in the business. Stay the fuck home.

Right now, they have raised $211 for the bus. That'll basically get them a rental car from Enterprise for maybe a week or so. My question is, what's going to happen to this money when they don't raise enough money for a bus, which of course they won't. Where's the money going to go? Is it going to be returned to all the fans? Doubt it. This is fucking bullshit and makes rock fans look stupid. You'd be better off flushing your money down the drain because that's what these poor stupid fans have done.

I'm out like Dope having a tour bus,

Ozzy Stillbourne