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If you remember back a few years ago, we had an advice column by Rikki Rockett called Dear Dr. Rockett. It was a huge success and even took to the airwaves on KNAC. Due to Rikki's busy schedule, Dr. Rockett is currently on hiatus, but that doesn't mean that you Sludgeaholics still aren't fucked in the head! You still have problems and still need guidance. So this is what we're going to do for you. We're going to have your questions answered each month by a special Sludge Celebrity! But we'll never announce who that Sludge Celebrity is going to be, so you won't know who's going to answer your question. That's right, it could be anybody! You could be writing about a serious problem and maybe that month Nikki Sixx would be giving out the advice! Or maybe it could be Scott Ian, or it could be Jim Bob Dwarf. It could be Jenna Jameson, or it could be Matt from the Wild Boyz. It could be Paul Gargano or it could be Jaime Hunting! How scary would that be? You'll never know you will be giving you advice until it's posted on the page. Fuck, it could be Dr. Rockett for old times sake! You just never know. So send your emails to AskTheStars@metalsludge.tv.
You can ask anything, but make sure you get to the point. We know it might be asking a lot, but try to spell everything correctly and don't write in all caps. Obviously this will exclude any Slaughter fans from participating, but that's the way the drumstick drops. Your questions can be about love, sex, drinking, gambling, stealing, arson, wrestling, car jacking, Britney Spears' breast size, cooking (maybe Jani Lane will answer those for us), or just life in general. It can be serious or just a question on butt plugs. If you have a problem, we have your answer. It might not be the right answer, but it'll be answered! Now we can't guarantee all your emails will get posted on the page and answered by a Sludge Celebrity. It might get answered, it might not, or Bastard Boy Floyd might delete it by "mistake." But we'll do our best to try and have somebody answer it for you. Also, don't request that your email be answered by any "rock star" specifically or we'll delete it. We don't have time for your silly games, bucky. Plus, don't ask stupid questions like, "Why isn't hair metal on MTV" or "What's the fastest land animal?" This is an advice column, so if you can't figure out what to ask, don't ask anything. Once again that email address is AskTheStars@metalsludge.tv!
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