Top 10 Worst Heavy Metal Hair Cuts of All Time!
Was this a hair cut, or a Halloween costume?
The Top 10 Worst Heavy Metal Hair Cuts of All Time!
By Metal Sludge
# 10. Bruce Dickinson = Fear of the Bieber
Iron Maiden is one of the world’s most successful Heavy Metal bands. But their singers hair cut sucked more dick than Chris Crocker. Metal God Bruce Dickinson sang "Run to the Hills" but could have very well been singing "Baby Baby Baby" just the same. Check out Bruce’s hair. It’s basically Justin Bieber with some length.This style can be achieved with a tupperware bowl and a couple quick snips across the front. We even did a little photoshop experiment to show you the uncanny resemblance to Teen Pop Star Justin Bieber and the Metal Lord of England Bruce Dickinson. Check it out HERE!
Is Bruce the Justin Bieber of Hevay Metal!
It happened a full 3 decades ago, but Ozzy did it first. He basically went nuts one nite and just shaved his head. Ozman did this before Sinead O’connor, before Michael Jordan and even before Britney Spears! Of course it was not as crazy as some of his other behavior over time. A quick check list: 1. Ozzy snorted ants with Motley Crue. 2. Ozzy pissed on the Alamo. 3. Ozzy bit the head off a bat. 4. Ozzy bit the head off a dove. 5. Ozzy once shot the families 17 cats while wearing a white suit which was covered in blood after the shooting spree. A site called OZZYHEAD alleges some crazy details about Ozzy’s crazy life.
Ozzy with a shaved head makes Charles Manson look friendly.
The former KISS guitarist helped co-write one of their early 80s biggest hits "Lick It Up". But soon after he was wrapping it up when they booted him from the group. Vinnie took his licks, tricks and silly hair-do fix to form the Vinnie Vincent Invasion. That lasted about as long as Mark St. John’s tenure in KISS. His entire band soon bailed and started Slaughter who went Platinum while on tour as support to – you guessed it – KISS. Vinnie is a dog lover, which makes sense since he use to look like a Chow!
Meow or am I a Chow?
# 7. Steve Plunkett – Turn Up The Radiation
It’s been a while since we’ve heard from Autograph, but the memory of Steve Plunkett’s red blazing hair is still firmly etched into our brains. Almost as much as their 1985 smash hit "Turn Up The Radio." In the years after the band faded into 1-hair-band-hit obscurity, Plunk wrote music and songs for TV shows that included "Beverly Hills 90210", "Melrose Place" & "The Simpsons." No word if firecrotch and the boys will ever reunite, but there is always hope. If they do – hopefully he’ll have a new hair style to bring to the table.
Was Steve Plunkett of Autograph the real red rocker?
Wednesday 13 comes in at #6. Not only is he the singer of Muderdolls, but clearly someone murdered his hair as well. Do you think any hair dressers out there have ever had a client walk in with this picture and asked… "Can you make my hair look like this?" This wreck of a cut looks like Edward Scissor Hands trimmed this while sitting shotgun in a Pretty Boy Floyd tour van.
Wed 13 looks like Rick Allen cut his hair with a left handed scissors!
# 5 Jim Gillette = Hair Extension Overdose
Holy hair extensions Bleach Boy! The only thing sadder than this picture, is that a half dozen rare Albino Horses probably had their mane’s sheered for a Nitro photo shoot. Back in the 80s it seemed that 1 of every 5 musicians on the Sunset Strip had some hair weaved in. But no one more than Mr. Gillette. White rhino, bleached screamer or tattoo’d dude fit this guy. Jim makes no bones about what he does, and it’s usually to the extreme! Gillette has went on to become famous for some crazy shit. Like this SCREAM, this PHOTO, his kids MOHAWKS & lastly this gem of a musical PIECE!
# 4. Tommy Lee = Coolio or Toolio?
Motley Crue gave us Rock N’ Roll and possibly the coolest rock drummer ever. Sadly since the drum kit went upside down, the coolest thing Tommy has done was make his wife Pam go upside down in that porn. We loved our stick twirlin’ bad boy as much as anyone, but those Fo-Shizzle Dread-Dizzle cuts land him #4 for Worst Heavy Metal Hair Cut of All Time!
Tommy "Whip My Hair" Lee
# 3. David Lee Roth = Mean Bleach
Might as well jump. Right into traffic! Fuck. That is one scary hair style but would be money in the bank during Halloween. After years of selling out arenas and stadiums, Roth sold out again when he started hiring Van Halen tribute players to back him. Dave went from sexy to sketchy almost over night. But thank the Lord he finally cut those last 20 strands off. Bummer is, now he looks like an even bigger goof.
Could this sell as well as the Gene Simmons costumes?
# 2. W. Axl Rose = Actual Cornrows
The leader of Guns N’ Roses comes in as our runner up. Actual Cornrows would have been a better stage name during this run. Axl looks like a cross between E.T., Carrot Top and The Predator. At the end of the day, you cannot deny his talent, or mistake his voice. Yet, he adds an element of danger, and at times – insanity to everything that he is involved in.
Ron Howard, E.T. or Children of the Corn?
# 1. Bret Michaels = Horse Hair Helmet
It’s been a while since Bret has been in the news, so we’re guessing he must be in good health. Today the Poison frontman is tops in our latest poll. This monstrosity of a hair helmet could have very well brought on that brain buzz that landed him in ER a few years back. Not sure who was doing hair and make up for the"Raine"video, but this rug would have looked more realistic. Bret openly talked about his extensions on reality TV being the finest that money could buy, but this photo was before the "Rock Of Love" money wagon came in.
This follicle riff raff has earned Bret Michaels with the prestigious honor of – The Worst Heavy Metal Hair Cut of All Time!
This looks a little bit like THIS
Worst of Sludge