SLUDGEAHOLIC OF THE MONTH -
For those of you who frequent our Gossip Boards, you might recognize the name OverMuch. Well he’s this month’s Sludgeaholic Of The Month. Why? We have no idea really, but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
1. Where are you from?
I’m originally from a town so tiny, it ain’t even on the map. Cridersville, Ohio. The town measures exactly 1 square mile. I lived there until I was 18 and got smart enough to get the fuck out. After a lengthy stint in the Army (and getting to take part in the sold-out Iraq Tour ’90), I settled into the Seattle area.
2. Ambitions: My biggest ambition is to join Cheap Trick. Once I get in the band, I’ll haul Poison into court for ripping off our excellent song "She’s Tight" and using the riffs in "Talk Dirty To Me." How Poison got away with that shit, I’ll never know. Maybe I should ask Dr. Rockett, eh?
3. Turn-ons: World Peace, bunnies, chicks who listen to the same music I do, good pot, blowjobs, rimjobs, handjobs, chicks with jobs, etc…
4. Turn-offs: Finding out that your girl is cheating on you…with your doberman, rudeness (honestly…I’m one polite motherfucker in real life), bad acid, rap, bigots, pedestrians that live after you hit them.
5. What do you do for a living?
I work as a fluffer on gay porn flicks. When I’m not doing that, I’m a team lead for what seems to be the world’s only profitable dotcom.
6. Any formal eduction?
My family has always been full of Ohio State grads…go BUCKEYES! But I myself skipped college for the military…I needed to get outta Ohio as soon as I could to avoid slitting my wrists. So instead of killing myself, I got the opportunity to bring despair and misery to others in my 60-ton M1 tank. Fun!
7. Favorite bands: D-A-D. Remember them? Only two albums out in the US but still selling millions in Europe. Fucking love that group. Not so much metal anymore (if they ever were) but they rock hard, and with loads of talent. For sheer agression, Iced Earth are my band of choice these days. Their album "Something Wicked This Way Comes" is a fucking masterpiece. I like most of Bruce Dickinson’s solo work, Kiss (snicker) and the more bombastic metal bands.
8. Least favorite bands: Poison, Trixter, Warrant, Motley Crue after "Theater of Pain", and any other crap pop band that people called "metal." Calling Poison "metal" (or even "talented") is like calling Pearl Jam "alternative." P.J. ain’t an alternative to anything, and there’s no metal in Poison. That’s why I love Sludge…it gives ordinary music fans a voice…a voice that brings these washed up "metal" stars’ egos down a notch or two. There’s no reason to have an ego when your name’s Kevin Dubrow…and Metal Sludge affords us the opportunity to tell him so.
9. How long have you been coming to Metal Sludge?
Over a year. I was doing a lot of heroin/crack/extacy/horse tranqilizers at the time, so it’s a little fuzzy.
10. You are a regular on our Gossip Board. Give us one person you hate on there and one person who’s cool.
Only one? Jesus, that’s hard. I’d have to go with that Hollywood Bomb douchebag. Whatever third world country he sprung from needs to be nuked ASAP. As far as the one cool person, well, there are a few. But from what I’ve seen so far, the orginization called The Sludge Mafia seems to be kicking ass and taking names. They haven’t said word one to me yet, so I can’t tell if they’re going to be way cool or complete dicks. Time will tell, I suppose. I just wish I’d thought of it first.
11. People think I’m: …a pedophile. I was *aquitted*, people!!! No, seriously, people think I’m a complete loudmouth. I’m a very quiet guy, actually.
12. Why are you called OverMuch?
It’s my old prison nickname. They called me "OverMuch" because that was my favorite postion in the weekly gang rapes. Truthfully, tho…"Overmuch" is a largely European term meaning "too much." I.e: I’m not worried about it overmuch. It’s also a D-A-D song title. "I’m much too much…I’m overmuch!" The funky capitalization is my own artistic license.
13. When not reading Metal Sludge, I most likely can be found: Masturbating, playing computer games (Alice, Unreal Tournament, Quake 3), stalking playgrounds, poisoning the local tapwater, or hiking the great Northwest.
14. Ever paid for sex?
Oh, I pay for it every time I have to go get a shot of penicillin or crab shampoo. THAT is the ULTIMATE price, my friends. But it’s still not enough to disuade me from my steady diet of discount crack whores.
15. How do you feel about winning the February Sludgeaholic Of The Month?
Honored, and weird. I’m actually wet. Which is weirder still, considering I haven’t had a vagina since the operation. Why I got picked is kind of a mystery to me, though. I guess you guys read the boards more than you let on…which is both enlightening and scary. I think that there’s others more deserving than me, tho, but thanks from the bottom of my shriveled, blackened heart.
16. Words to live by: "Get the fuck away from my car!"
NOTE TO OVERMUCH: Don’t go into a career in comedy.
Congratulations to Rod for being our February Sludgeaholic Of The Month.