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Sludgeaholic Of The Month – November 2000, Scotti Corabi

 

SLUDGEAHOLIC OF THE MONTH –
NOVEMBER 2000


Scotti Corabi

This month’s Sludgeaholic Of The Month is none other than the creator of the Yahoo Metal Sludge Fan Club, Scotti Corabi!

Scotti’s Data Sheet

1. Where are you from?
Grew up in Beirut during the 80s. That wasn’t a happy time. I now reside in a homeless shelter.

2. Ambitions:
a) To serve Metal Sludge, first and foremost, through awareness and promotion. No, I don’t have a life, besides standing outside city hall all day until chow time.
b) Either get a job and re-take my place in society or remain a fat homeless prick. Either way, I’m fucked.
c) Lose weight.
d) Educate the public on the importance of middle-to-upper class citizens giving us bums money when we beg for it. Goddammit, you think what we do is FUN?
e) I was kidding about that "Lose weight" ambition. They expect me to drink just 1 Slim Fast shake for breakfast? Christ, I’d have to down 6 of those fuckers just to make the growling go away.
f) Make my bitch ex-wife pay for throwing me out of my house. I think I can sum up what I think of her with this: She’s mean.

3. Turn-ons: Food, Judge Judy, Roseanne, Rosie O’Donnell, $10 bull-dyke hookers, most of the Metal Sludge chat room women (including CherryCandy, believe it or not), spare change, Thunderbird wine, and Pez.

4. Turn-offs: Those rich motherfuckers who miss my cup when they drop me change! Nice aim, asshole! I’d love to see your bathroom floor. Usually any situation that doesn’t involve food turns me off (i.e., "Nice place you have. Where’s your fridge? No food? Well, I gotta get home and take a dump. See you later.").

5. What do you do for a living?
I make sure city hall doesn’t fall over by leaning up against it all day with my friend, Crazy James.

6. Any formal education?
Yes, a bachelor’s degree in Computer Science, which translates to, "Everything you learn during this time will be obsolete when you graduate."

7. How long have you been coming to Metal Sludge?
Not sure of the exact date, but it was around the time Fred Coury’s 20 Questions were posted.

8. How often do you visit our page?
Damn near every hour after 7 in the evening, every day. . Metal Sludge is the only good place to get a summary of what’s going on in the rock world.

9. What made you decide to do a Yahoo Metal Sludge Fan Club?
For a few reasons, actually.
a) I wanted to contribute something to the page. I didn’t think that constant emails to the staff asking to be apart of the Sludgewire would help, and sending something retarded to Bastard Boy Floyd for the mailbag didn’t qualify. I enjoy the site very much, and I wanted to let the staff and the world know it.
b) I also wanted to give Sludgeaholics a moderated forum to post their opinions about recent news or what not. Moderated, yes. Sometimes, you can’t really get anything off the ground on the Sludge Board without some dickhead with no registered name posting a personal insult about someone 4 or 5 messages down. Don’t get me wrong, the Sludge Board needs to stay the way it is. I wouldn’t call the club’s forum an "alternative", but it’s there if anyone wants to use it. Abuse it, and you’re gone.

10. Favorite bands: Most of the usual assortment of 80s hair bands, but I’ve taken a liking to Hair of the Dog, Chlorine, Mars Electric, Buckcherry, and American Shame. Some of the more heavier bands I like would be PMK5, Type O Negative, WASP, Iron Maiden, the usual bunch.

11. Least Favorite bands: Can’t really name anything off the top of my head, but that’s not to say I haven’t heard something in my life that would make me want to drink kerosene and piss on a fire.

12. When was the last time you got laid?
A couple nights ago. I got piss drunk and about 7 people had to hoist me up and lay me in bed. Is that what you were asking?13. When I wake up every morning, I remind myself: that there is a God, and him and a few of his apostles aren’t huddled around a hole in the cloud shitting on me.

14. When not reading Metal Sludge, I can mostly be found: Depends on the time. Breakfast, lunch, dinner, I’m here scarfing some mad food. Later on in the evening, I’m usually pissing around on this computer that the employees here let me use.

15. How do you feel about winning Sludgeaholic Of The Month for November 2000?
Wasn’t expecting it, that’s for sure. I don’t have any pics of me with anybody famous, if you don’t count the time I posed with River Phoenix outside of a bar when he was lying down on the sidewalk going s pastic. I wonder what ever happened to him?

16. Personal Motto: If you can’t fuck it, eat it. If I may, I’d like to take some time to thank all of the members of the club. As of this time, I have 72 confirmed Sludgeaholics (including me) who visit the club. Thank you for making it a success so far.

Props to everyone,
Scotti Corabi
Your Wannabe of Sludge

If you’d like to check out the Yahoo Metal Sludge Fan Club and congratulate Scotti for being the Sludgeaholic Of The Month, you can do so at http://clubs.yahoo.com/clubs/metalsludge.

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