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Metal Sludge Invades Rock Fest Tour, 7/9/02

METAL SLUDGE INVADES METAL EDGE’S ROCK FEST TOUR!


"Mr Fit & Trim" Jani Lane with Jim Bob Dwarf!

Instead of our typical 20 Questions, we’re doing a total of 97 Questions today!

On July 3rd, we sent everybody’s favorite interviewer, Jim Bob Dwarf, to Elgin, IL., to invade the Rock Fest tour, featuring Dokken, Ratt, Warrant, L.A. Guns and Enuff Z’Nuff. Though these were not the typical interviews you might have come to expect!

We took a page out of Stuttering John’s book and had Jim Bob go around and ask random questions to random rockers. He basically walked up to people and started asking them our questions. Everybody was basically cool except Warrant’s Erik Turner, who refused to do it and can be seen on the right giving the bird, and Ratt’s Warren DeMartini, who politely declined.

Jim Bob writes:

"Erik Turner took a picture with me and was cool about that, but when I asked if he’d answer a couple of questions, he said that he wasn’t into that. He stated that if he was going to answer questions he’d ‘do the
full 20 or 27 questions or whatever.’ Jani was basically inaccessible because he was playing pool and had loads of people around him. When Overstreet asked to take a picture of us, Jani said, ‘why, so you can make fun of me?’ But he took the picture anyway then went back to playing pool.

Most people were cool with the questions. I asked maybe 6 to 12 questions of everybody. Some were a little more hurried than others but it was pretty good. Jizzy was good. Nobody really blew me any shit. Mick Brown seemed afraid of me and went in the other direction whenever he saw me around."

Jim Bob did a great job and got a total of 11 interviews and asked 97 questions total! We’ll start off this series of interviews with Enuff Z’Nuff’s Donnie Vie. Jim Bob reports:

"Enuff Z’Nuff was told to go on a 1/2 hour early, at 5 p.m. and only Chip and Monaco were there! So it was just the 2 of them for a crowd of about 15 people. Ricky Parent got there 4 songs into their set and so they finished up as a 3-piece. Donnie got lost on the way and by the time he got there the set was done. Chip left right away. Donnie flew out from L.A. this morning just to do this gig and so he was pissed.

"Phil Lewis was saying some shit about Donnie on the stage and Donnie retorts with another rant. Whenever Donnie had something to say, he found me and just went off on a tangent. He does it several times. The Donnie vs. Michael Angelo thing was quite amusing too.

So the first person I talked to was Donnie Vie. It’s probably the longest segment there is and he chimes in on the tape here and there throughout the night. He had a lot to get off his chest!"
 


Donnie Vie – Enuff Z’Nuff Singer


Joni Vie, Donnie, Jim Bob, and some chick

Donnie: First off, I want to apologize to everyone for missing the show. They gave me the wrong instructions. I flew in from L.A. and everything to make this show, and man, I’m bummed out. You know, I let people down and I don’t like to do that. I didn’t spend $600 in airplane tickets just to blow off the show, you know. We showed up a couple of minutes late. They told us to turn at the wrong gas station. My wife and I are all – she’s all freaked out and stuff, you know. We tried our best. You can see I’m standing here all straight and fuckin’ sober and ready to go. And, you know, I’m here.
Jim Bob: Well you guys did have to go on kind of early.
It’s kind of early. People should know that I can’t stand the sunlight or the outside or the heat. Look I’m melting!

Jim Bob: How many band guys here do you think are wearing wigs?
That are here? In this? Oh I don’t know. And if I did, I wouldn’t give that away. That’s, like, the ultimate; I’d get my ass kicked for sure then! The rest of it’s just one-on-one band rivalry, you know. You can’t give away the personal shit like that. I know my brother Chip’s not. He doesn’t have the balls to get one, and he should! (Donnie laughs)

Jim Bob: Have you ever read one of Jizzy Pearl’s books?
Yeah! Joni, which book did we read by Jizzy Pearl?
Joni Vie: Angst for……No, wait. The first one.
Jim Bob: Crickets?
Yeah! It was great. We thought it was great.

Jim Bob: What’s your take on the Pledge Of Allegiance debate?
I think it’s fucked that we don’t get to say it. I think that this country was founded on ‘In God We Trust,’ and now why are they changing it? Because of other people coming here who are not from here? Well, I’m not prejudiced or anything, but what the fuck? This country was founded on one thing, and now all the things that don’t have anything to do with this country are ruining the world and this country, and taking it over. And what, are we just going to give the whole fucking thing away, and get rid of God? Well who are they going to have to answer to on the last day? And it’s coming. It’s coming, motherfuckers! And He’s pissed off. You can see how many crosses I’m wearing. So what do you think I’d say on that one? Fuck them! Fuck them motherfuckers who don’t believe in God, ’cause that’s fucked up.

Jim Bob: What weighs more: a pound of guitar picks or 16 ounces of bass picks?
16 ounces of bass picks. An ounce of guitar picks.

Jim Bob: No, a POUND of guitar picks or 16 ounces of bass picks.
What is that like freebase? Is that what they’re trying to say?
(Note to Donnie: No Donnie, it has nothing to do with freebase, but we see where your head is at! Try being a little less paranoid and so defensive.
Actually, it’s a trick question because a pound of guitar picks and 16 ounches of bass picks both weigh the same. One pound eqauls 16 ounces! See, you always learn something at Metal Sludge!)

If that’s what they’re trying to say I gave that shit up a while ago. I can’t remember, but you used to get…..I forget how much it was, but there’s not too much cocaine in base. It was like, toenails and chalk and shit like that.
Jim Bob: Soap!
When I smoked fish food that’s was it. I realized that’s enough. I’d had enough. It’s been a good year, year and a half since I touched that shit. I’ve kind of been getting it together now. I wish people could give that a rest. (Donnie laughs) Let things die! I’m sorry, I’m trying to change, you know. If they’ll let me! I’m trying to be a better man if people will let me.

Jim Bob: How many past and present members of L.A. Guns can you name?
Steve Riley, Kelly Nickels, Phil Lewis, Tracii Guns, umm, (pause) Matthew Nelson, (pause) ummm, let’s see, Donnie Osmond. Isn’t that all them? Isn’t that the original band? I think that’s the original band. I don’t have anything against the band. So I feel kinda bad that I’ve been slagging ‘em. As a matter of fact, I shouldn’t have anything personal against the singer either. It’s just, he used to go out with my wife for a lot of years. I’m just a little faggot pussy when it comes to stuff like that. I’m a jealous little prick. You know, I finally found someone I love and I spent a lot of years with no one, very lonely and mean. A very lonely, mean drug addict person. And you know, I wasn’t born that way. This business turned me into that, and it just made me a very big asshole. And I don’t want to be that. And you know, even though he just slagged me on the stage, I’ll still apologize to them guys for slagging on them. I really got nothing against the band, you know. It’s not their fault.
Jim Bob: Well we can go get them now if you want! You and me!
They’re doing their best. I got nothing against them, they’re trying. Tell Rikki Rockett and Stevie Racquel (Donnie pronounced it that way) that I got nothing against them. Tell Rikki Rockett and Steve Racquel, let them know that I love them and they’re wonderful human beings. I’m big fans of them. I hadn’t seen Stevie in a long time, then I saw him outside a Ratt show, and he goes, "Donnie Vie, get me in to the Ratt show!" And I’m like, ‘who am I to get anyone in to a Ratt show? Everyone hates me! Like I could really get ya in, you know!" (Donnie laughs) Yeah I got dirt. I got dirt under my fingernails. The reason I say all of this is to cool out with the base questions and shit like that. I mean, I’m trying to be a better person. I know I was a mean jagoff. Let that shit die. Let that shit die or I’ll start talking about Rikki Rockett and Stevie Racquel!

Jim Bob: Do you think the turnout would have been better had the Killer Dwarfs been on the bill?
(Joni Vie and friends laugh uncontrollably at this question!)
Uh. well, you know I couldn’t tell you. I don’t think I’ve ever seen them play, but I heard they’re, uh, great. All I know is I feel real sorry for me right now with all these questions.

Jim Bob: Did you buy Gene Simmons’ Tongue magazine?
No. And you ask me all the fucked-up questions. How do people expect me to be a nice guy when people treat me this way? This is how I’ve been treated my whole career! This is why I am this way, is because of this!
(Note from Metal Sludge: Dude, quit being a drama queen. In fact, your new name is Donnie Drama Queen. All he asked you was about Gene’s magazine, not if you ever sucked cock for a hit of crack. Settle down.)

Jim Bob: Awww.
This is why I am the way I am! I was a sweet little kid! And then turned into. I made it out of nowhere with nothing, and then just got fucked from day one. I couldn’t even enjoy my first record deal, I was in courts and stuff, being sued. My first day in the business and I couldn’t even enjoy my first record. I still haven’t gotten a royalty check! I’m bitter!
Jim Bob: Ron Fajerstein!
Yeah! I’m bitter as hell! Wouldn’t you be bitter? I think I kick ass! I think I got a lot of talent. But no one will ever get to know it! You know? As long as I’m making records on ‘Bill’s Records’ and shit like that, you know, fuckin ‘Jukebox Jive’ and shit, you know. And I don’t even get paid for those records! Ballads of the fuckin’ 30’s.

Jim Bob: Any last words?
Yeah. Good luck. I heard the Poison tour’s doing real well. Good luck to those guys out there. I miss it. Met my wife on that tour so now I’m enjoying her. Doing a lot of recording at home, getting ready to put my solo record out. The new Enuff Z’Nuff record’s done, it’s coming out and it’s great. It’s the best one.

Jim Bob: When’s it coming out in the states?
Should be coming out in about 3 months. It’s great. It’s the best album to date. For sure it is. Everyone who’s heard it thinks it is.


Adam Hamilton – L.A. Guns Bass Player


Jim Bob and Phil Lewis
Yeah, we know it’s not Adam Hamilton, so what?

JB: Who are you?
Adam, from L.A. Guns.

JB: So how’s the pussy looking for tonight? Got anything lined up?
(Surveys the crowd) It’s looking pretty fucking slim.

JB: Have you ever seen Mike Fasano’s nut sack?
No, but I hear the going rate is 25 bucks.

JB: Between me and you, what band has the lamest merchandise?
Has the lamest merchandising? Um, I don’t know. I don’t take care of that. I don’t even see the merchandise. I would say KISS. All of their shit seems to fall apart.

JB: Who’s bus is most likely to break down before the end of the tour?
The crew! The production bus. They’ve already had to switch busses twice.

JB: How many past and present members of L.A. Guns can you name?
Umm, Jizzy Pearl… Johnny Crypt, um, Mick Cripps…. um, dude, I don’t know! (Laughs)
 


Keff Ratcliffe – L.A. Guns Guitar Player


Keff and Jim Bob

JB: Who are you?
Keff Ratcliffe

JB: How does it feel to be in a band that tours so much for nothing?
So much for nothing? To tell you the truth, I’m getting a lot out of this, and I don’t mean it *that* way.

JB: What rock stars should just come out of the closet already?
All of the previous bands that I’ve been in!

JB: Do you have any idea who’s playing in Ratt right now?
Of course I do. I know all those guys.

JB: Do you wish you were on the Poison tour instead?
No, ’cause I like selling more tickets than they are!

JB: Who has the best blow on this tour?
The girls on the L.A. Guns bus.

JB: Give us your best drunken Paul Gargano story? You have to have at least one.
I refrain! Wait for the video!

JB: Is there anyone more annoying than C.C. DeVille?
(Long pause) Anyone more annoying than C.C. DeVille? Um, how can I put this, shit! Um, that’s a tough question! But, uh, no! I don’t think there is!
 


More ramblings with Donnie Vie

(Note: During L.A. Guns’ set, Phil Lewis made a comment about Donnie Vie
missing the gig, calling him "Winky." Here’s Donnie’s retort!)

Ok Metal Sludge. About Phil’s comment. Phil made a comment about something about the balls to get on stage. I said something about the band in general and I’d like to leave it at that. I’d just like to leave everything at that. Nothing personal. And obviously, they’ve got some kind of animosity and said something against me.
Joni Vie: But he made it personal.
No, I made it personal.
JV: No, he did!
I made it personal a long time ago. I been startin’ talkin’ shit all over town. And I got nothing against them guys. I should keep my mouth shut.
JV: And you love everybody.
And I love everybody. Trying to be a better person. Trying to get it together. I was despicable and I was fucked up and I used to be very depressed and I didn’t have a good thing to say. And now things matter. People matter. If people could let dead dogs lie, I can and everything too. So let’s start from scratch. I’d like to start from scratch with the past and with the world. If I get a chance.
JV: Right on baby.
I’m a nicer guy. I’m finally happy. And I got nothing to be upset about. And look, I can just take shit from the fuckin’ jagoffs and not fuckin’ say a thing.
JV’s friend: People don’t want to hear that though. They want to hear the shit-talking.
No, that was perfect, what I just said.

(Note from Metal Sludge: Donnie, be a walker, not a talker. If you love everybody and are such a happy person now, then show everybody and just shut your mouth. Oh yea, and try showing up to the gig a bit earlier. Thanks.)
 


Mike Fasano – Warrant Drummer


"The Sack" and Jim Bob

JB: Who are you?
I’m Mike.

JB: Did you buy Gene Simmons’ Tongue magazine?
No, I heard about it. But I don’t really know anything about it. I saw it on CNN so he’s doing somethin’ right. Motherfucker.

JB: Do you have any idea who Monaco is?
Yeah! Johnny Monaco. Of course I do. Skinny little fucker! I love him!

JB: Off the top of your head, can you name one Jackyl song?
I don’t know, but that fuckin’ Jesse James Dupree, I read his thing. He really sounds like a dumb-ass. You know what I mean? I mean really stupid. Almost as stupid as the Bam Bam McConnell. That guy thinks he’s a rad drummer. Did you do that interview?
JB: Nope.
That guy thinks he’s the shit. Totally. I love it. That guy’s got balls. Those two guys should have have Super Balls awards, for talking as much shit as they do.
Some chick nearby: Hey Mike, have you ever actually weighed your balls?
Weighed my balls? No. Well maybe a long time ago.
JB: Maybe they’ve grown since then.
Well as I get older, I think they get bigger I think.
JB: And they droop more.
Yeah. Yeah! Jim Bob! Talk to Jim Bob!

JB: Do you wish you were on the Poison tour instead?
You know, there’s a few things I miss about being on the Poison tour. Just hanging with Rocko, my Vint-Drum Mafia partner. And playing all the really nice venues. But, uh, this is a great tour. All the bands get along, we all hang out. We’re having a good time. This is a good tour.

JB: Do you have any idea who’s playing in Ratt right now?
Of course I do. Don’t be ridiculous. Dude, I hail Ratt! Ratt’s my favorite band. Bobby Blotzer’s my favorite drummer. What are you kidding me?

JB: On an average night, what percent of the crowd leaves during Dokken’s set?
Oh, um, a few people leave. I don’t know. Maybe a third? Maybe? I think they’re tired after hearing all the bands, and the heat that we’re in. But, hey, the people that stay are are fucking down with it. Dokken fucking rock every fucking night.

JB: Who’s bus is most likely to break down before the end of the tour?
Let me tell you something. Fucking Firehouse breaks down every day. L.A. Guns breaks down everyday. I’d say Firehouse and L.A. Guns. And the crew bus! The production bus. They just got a new bus. It’s a nightmare. Those 3 busses for sure. There’s a lot of busses that break down.

JB: I’ve never been on a real tour bus before.
You haven’t? Sure you have. L.A. Guns, dude, is filthy! It’s so filthy. That’s the bus you want to be on. That’s where all the action is. Tracii Guns, fuckin’ he rules dude.

JB: I’ve never met Tracii.
You’ve never met Tracii?
JB: Never.
What else is up man? How’ve you been?
JB: It’s all good. Definitely.
Hey look, it’s Wild Mick Brown! Hey Wild Mick! Dude! This is my friend Jim-Bob.
Wild Mick Brown: Hi.
Dude, I love when Wild Mick did 20 Questions. When he said, "Mike Fasano = sounds like he makes a good pasta!" I love it! You motherfucker!
Wild Mick Brown: I’m glad I said something nice, ’cause I didn’t know I was gonna see him on tour this summer! (Everybody laughs and then Wild Mick runs away.)

Jim Bob, Fasano, and Wild Mick Brown

Billy Morris – Warrant Guitar Player

JB: Who are you?
Billy Morris! Lead guitar, Warrant.

JB: How many Metal Sludge shirts do you see nightly on this tour?
Umm… between 5 and 10.

JB: Any idea who’s playing in Ratt right now?
Of course, man! Warren DiMartini is the king of guitar!

JB: Any idea who Monaco is?
Johnny Monaco! Guitar player, Enuff Z’Nuff.

JB: Do you consider Spitfire Records a real record label?
Uh… are they still around?
JB: I think so. I think they’ve got Ted Nugent, Alice Cooper, etc.
Well if they’ve got Terrible Ted then they’re getting into the big-time. So I do consider them a real label. Although they heard my CD and they turned me down.
JB: Your solo CD?
My solo CD.
JB: Oh. Well they must suck then.
Ha!

JB: Pamela Anderson has Hep C. Would you still bang her?
Yes!

JB: Off the top of your head, can you name one Jackyl song?
Um… the Chainsaw song. ‘I’m A Chainsaw’ or something like that, right?
JB: The Lumberjack Song! You got it.
(Sings) "I’m a lumberjack now baby!"

JB: Have you ever used Jerry Dixon soap?
No, I have not. I have not been blessed with the power of his soap.
JB: The kind with the pick in the middle?
I think it was sold out before I got my order in.

JB: What’s your take on the Pledge of Allegiance debate?
I think it’s bullshit that they’re trying to fuck with it. I think it’s great the way it is. They’ve got other problems that they should FUCKIN’ worry about.

JB: Can I have a guitar pick?
Yes you may. I’ll have to get one from my tech. Do you want it to be in soap?
JB: No, it doesn’t have to be in soap.
 

JB: What’s your best drunken Paul Gargano story?
Well, I just spent a week with him on the last tour. It was so hectic. There were some drunk nights, but I don’t have anything funny to say. I guess, uh, hangovers on the way to the next show in the morning in the van.

JB: Do you wish you were on the Poison tour instead?
No, I’m having way more fun this year!

JB: Do you think the turnout would have been better had the Killer Dwarfs been on the bill?
ABSOLUTELY! Love the Dwarfs!
 


Jizzy Pearl – Ratt Singer


Donnie, Jizzy, and Jeff Overstreet
 

JB: Who are you?
Who are you?

JB: I’m Jim-Bob. People know me. Who are you?
Jizzilla.

JB: What’s your take on the Pledge Of Allegiance debate?
I think it’s fuckin’ stupid. I think that there’s a lot more important things that people should be consumed with than a couple of words.

JB: What’s your best drunken Paul Gargano story?
My best drunken Paul Gargano story was with L.A. Guns a couple of years ago. We have it on video. He was a sloppy, slurry mess. But uh, we love him.

JB: Off the top of your head, can you name one Jackyl song?
That stupid chainsaw song.
JB: That’s the Lumberjack song! Everybody knows that.
Oh wait. "Loves My Cock." Another fuckin’ anthem.

JB: Would you buy a painting from Eric Turner?
I didn’t know he painted.

JB: Well, I think he tries.
Finger paintings?

JB: Can I have a hug?
No.


Robbie Crane – Ratt Bass Player

JB: Who are you?
I’m the total loser/follower/bass player wannabe from Ratt.

JB: Is it true that Jani Lane is doing all of the cooking for this tour?
Completely not true. Jani Lane is doing all of the golfing on this tour.

JB: Have you ever used Jerry Dixon soap?
His soap? No but I’ve played his bass. He’s got great ones. GMPs

JB: Have you ever read one of Jizzy’s book’s?
Yes, both of them, and they’re pretty good actually! My wife and I laugh our asses off at ‘em.

JB: Would you consider Spitfire Records to be a real record label?
In today’s market, for hard rock music, definitely.

JB: Is there anybody more annoying than C.C. DeVille?
Yeah, Me!

JB: Who’s got the best blow on this tour.
UH, let me think. Well, I’ve got a pretty good copy of the movie Blow, and I think Warren’s got a good copy of it too.

JB: How many Metal Sludge shirts do you see in the crowd nightly?
Probably about 20 and there should be about 500,000 of ‘em! I love ‘em! I want one. Give me one!

JB: What rock star should just come out of the closet already?
Uh, let me think here. A good one. Uh, Vince Neil! No, in a good way!

JB: How does it feel to be in a band that tours so much for nothing?
Extremely amazing, but I think if we tour any more, we’re going to turn into, like Hanes white t-shirts, everywhere!

JB: Can I have a hug?
Yes! (Jim Bob and Robbie share a moment of male bonding.)


John Corabi – Ratt Rhythm Guitar Player

JB: Who are you?
I’m still trying to figure that one out.

JB: How many Metal Sludge shirts do you see in the crowd on a nightly basis?
Actually, I’ve been seeing quite a few.

JB: What’s your take on the Pledge Of Allegiance debate?
What’s that?
JB: They want to take the "one nation under God" part out of it.
This just goes to show you, like, just how up on world information I am. I just realized that we were at war with Afghanistan.
JB: We are? I thought the Russians were still fighting them.
You know, I was like still collecting money for like the Vietnam vets.

JB: Have you read one of Jizzy’s books yet?
Yes I have.

JB: Would you consider Spitfire Records a real record label?
Sure! Why not?

JB: What weighs more: a pound of guitar picks or 16 ounces of bass picks?
Uh, I would have to say the 16 ounces of bass picks.

JB: Is it true that Jani Lane is doing all of the cooking on this tour?
Um, no, actually, because I’ve had Jani’s cooking and it’s not very good, so this food has been pretty good. The hamburgers are awesome. I think it’s sponsored by George Foreman and the George Foreman Grill. So I just want to put a plug in there for George, and his son George, and his other son George, and his other son George, and his daughter Georgette…
JB: And they’re all bald!
And they’re all bad! Yes.

JB: Have you seen Mike Fasano’s nut sack?
Hide the can. On a nightly basis!


 

Alex De Rosso – Dokken Guitar Player

(Note: Fasano introduced me to Alex, the new guitar guy in Dokken. Since he’s Italian, Fasano remained on hand in case he had to translate anything.)

JB: Who are you?
Fasano: He’s Italian.
I’m the pizza man! (laughs) My name is Alex De Rosso.

JB: Who’d you jam with before Dokken?
Oh, I was a solo artist. I had acouple of CDs out. Japan, USA, Europe.

JB: I’ve heard of you, but I’ve not heard your music. But now I’m on the ball! I got Morpheus, Gnutella, WinMX, AudioGalaxy.
Oh no! Go to my site. www.AlexDeRosso.com.
Fasano: Nice work! Get that plug in there.
Go there, we have a couple of samples from each album, and the next album will be out in a couple of months. I hope.
JB: So you’re still doing solo stuff, even though you’re in Dokken?
Well actually I didn’t know that they would call me. So, I finished my solo album. I was mastering it, everything was finished. So I think that it will be out anyway.
Fasano: And a little bit of the Dokken… the Dokken pull will be good on that too. All the kids are gonna see ya.
JB: Yeah, you’ll be getting a whole bunch of new fans.
Well I hope to get a lot more!

JB: Off the top of your head, can you name one Jackyl song?
(pause) I’m too old! I cannot remember. I know the band absolutely but I cannot remember the name of the songs. I’m sorry! I’m sorry!
Fasano: The drummer’s got like, stacks coming out of his kick drum like a racing car. It’s cool. Yeah.

JB: Do you have any idea who’s playing in Ratt right now?
In Ratt?
JB: Yes.
I know everyone in Ratt. Do I have to say the names?
JB: No.
Alright, I know everyone in Ratt! (laughs) Fortunately I know everyone.

JB: Have you seen a copy of Gene Simmon’s Tongue magazine?
No, never. But I was a big fan of KISS too. Back when I started, KISS ruled!
JB: He’s got a new magazine out now, at least in the States. I’m not sure about overseas yet.
Well I heard something about it but I didn’t see it yet.

JB: Have you seen Mike Fasano’s nut sack yet?
(laughs)
Fasano: Hey!
Well Michael Fasano, he’s Italian, you know! He’s a-like me, yeah?
Fasano: Exactly! Alex De Rosso’s nutsack! Come on! We’re from Italy, dude!

JB: On an average night, what percent of the crowd leaves during Dokken’s set?
I don’t get it.
JB: How many people in the audience leave while you’re playing your set?
Oh, I don’t know. I didn’t watch the crowd! (laughs)
Fasano: Probably the same as everybody else’s closing set. People on the fuckin’ Tesla tour and all that shit or whatever. People leave. It’s a long day, dude. It’s a long hot day.
Is that it? Are we finished?

JB: One more question. Which band’s bus is most likely to break down before the end of the tour?
Oh, break down? What does it mean?
Fasano: You know how all the busses have been breaking down on the tour? All the busses? They stop working you know, the air conditioning’s been going out, they blow a tire on the side of the road. You know who’s been breaking down? You don’t even know that. A lot of busses have been breaking down on this tour. Who do you think’s going to break down next?
Next?
Fasano: There you go Jim Bob. I helped translate.
Ha! (laughs) I hope not our bus! Haha! (laughs really high)
Fasano: I’d say definitely the Firehouse bus, L.A. Guns’ bus, or the crew bus.
(laughs) I just want to say that I love everyone here. So I hope nobody’s bus breaks down. Everybody’s really been great to me.

JB: Can I have a guitar pick?
Yes! Here you go!
JB: Grazie mille.


Craig Bradford – Rock Fest Tour Manager


Billy Morris, Jim Bob, and Craig Bradford

JB: Who are you?
My name’s Craig, and I’m the singer/songwriter for Needle Park, and the resident tour manager for RockFest 2002.

JB: How many band guys here do you think are wearing wigs?
(laughs) Truthfully, my best guess would be….I think there’s four. Here comes one of them now! Oh no, it’s just Donnie Vie.

JB: Is it true that Jani Lane is doing the cooking for this tour?
Absolutely! We have the best food on our bus every night!

JB: Name one 80’s band that had no business getting a record deal?
Let me get my bro in on this one. Hey Adam! What 80’s band has no business getting a record deal?
Adam Hamilton: (Long pause) Duran Duran!
There you go! Duran Duran!

JB: Would you buy a painting from Erik Turner?
Fuck yeah I’d buy a painting from Erik Turner! I heard they’re pretty hot!

JB: Would you consider Spitfire Records a real record label?
Uh…(pause) Well, they haven’t released the Needle Park CD. So, until then, they’re not a real label.

JB: Have you ever used Jerry Dixon soap?
Fuck, I haven’t used soap since I’ve been out here, but if Jerry Dixon has some I’ll be the first to use it.

JB: On an average night, what percent of the crowd leaves during Dokken’s set?
Everybody leaves! As opposed to right after Warrant and Ratt. Fuck yeah!


Michael Angelo – Nitro Guitarist

(Note: Former Nitro guitarist Michael Angelo, you know, the 2-hand guy, was at RockFest checking out the show and wanted to unload because of Donnie Vie’s comments about him in his 3-Wind.)


Michael Angelo and Jim Bob with Donnie in the background

JB: Who are you?
My name is Michael Angelo.

JB: How many band guys do you think are here wearing wigs?
Who cares? Don Dokken!

JB: Did you buy Gene Simmon’s Tongue magazine?
No, but I’ve been to his house! I jammed with him. But I asked him when we were jamming, "Don’t stick your tongue out at me!" But he’s gone out with Cher so what am I gonna do.

JB: Between me and you, what band has the lamest merchandise?
I don’t know. I haven’t seen any. I know all the bands, so I haven’t looked at their stuff.

JB: Do you have any idea who Monaco is?
Yeah. John Monaco. I like him a lot.

JB: How many past and present members of L.A. Guns can you name?
Well I just talked to Steve Riley. We have the Holland connection. We both played with Tom Holland. He was in it before me, so I’ve known him forever. I know Tracii, but I don’t know any of the others.

JB: What weighs more, a pound of guitar picks or 16 ounces of bass picks?
Come on!

JB: Is there anyone more annoying than C.C. DeVille?
Donnie Vie. (laughs) I like C.C. He did the best play-by-play of the Superbowl that I’ve ever seen. I was over at his house watching it. He turned the sound off and did a running commentary.

JB: Any other Donnie Vie comments?
He’s a liar. And if I was in a band for 17 years, and I couldn’t even make it to the show today, I’d give it up too.
JB: He said they couldn’t find it.
Figures. I noticed he saw me and he didn’t exactly want to get close. I just think he’s a fuckin’ lying piece of shit, and you can quote me on that.

JB: What else you got going on now? You’ve been out of the spotlight for a few years.
I’m in a new company called Tradition Guitars. I got a signature series. MTV just did a thing on our company. We’re a young, upstart company that’s doing really good. And it’ll be out in about 6 weeks to 2 months. My band C4’s got a new album. I’ve been doing a lot in my studio. I’ll be playing in Nashville in a few weeks. We’re playing here (at Sammy K’s in Elgin, IL) in a few weeks. Doing a lot. It never stops.
 


Final Delusions from Donnie Vie

(These were given right after Donnie almost got into a fight with Michael Angelo in the parking lot)


Jim Bob, Warren DeMartini, Donnie, and Billy Morris
 

Stevie Racquel and Rikki Rockett, I know who you fuckers are. I’m not gonna tell you how I know. But come on, I was a bitter, mean, fuckin’ depressed individual for a few years. I never got to enjoy anything of this business.
And from the sounds of it, you still are a bitter, mean, fuckin’ depressed individual. Chill out with the sob story already. "Boo hoo, I was this, I was that, I never got to enjoy anything, boo fucking hoo. Poor me." Go cry a river somewhere else. Nobody likes a whinny bitch who always makes excuses for his behavior. Oh yea, and it’s Stevie Rachelle, not Stevie Racquel.
Rikki Rockett, you know you’ve gone a long ways and fuckin’ got to enjoy a lot of things. You know, it’s like, fuck I said some weird things. I don’t know why, you know.
I think it’s called drugs and a low self esteem.
Just trying to be entertaining or get a joke or whatever. But you motherfuckers are gonna get me killed out here!
Metal Sludge has never made Donnie Vie, or anybody else for that matter, say anything. Donnie, you were talking shit about bands before we even came along. You burned a million bridges before the idea of Metal Sludge was even thought of. Just because you open your mouth and get in trouble is no reason to blame us. We never put a gun to your head. You said what you wanted to say, and that’s cool, but take responsibility for it. Look in the mirror and take responsiblity for your own actions.
Next time, I’m telling the fuckin’ world who the fuck you are!
Next time? You just fucking did and you said it in your 3-Wind, too. Please try to pay attention.
And they’ll like to hear that. I mean they might not give a shit about me but they’ll like to hear who’s running Metal Sludge. Heheh! So, love you guys! Have fun out there. See you guys. And I love ya. And you better listen to me. You don’t want to pick a fight with a guy who’s got nothing to lose!
Whatever you say. Who are we to kill a good rumor?

Next.
 


So there you have it. 11 interviews for the price of one! Thanks to Jim Bob for pulling it off and not getting his ass beat!

For more information on this silly ass tour, you can go to www.MetalEdge-RockFest.com

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