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20 Questions with Metal Sludge’s “Hey, This Is What I Call Sludge” CD, 4/1/04



This week we’re doing 20 Questions with our very own CD! That’s right, we’re interviewing a fucking CD, a compact disc. So what? You’re the one who’s actually reading this, so don’t look at us weird.

We sat down with the "Hey, That’s What I Call Sludge" CD earlier this week and asked it a variety of questions. As you should know by now, Metal Sludge is releasing our first CD so we thought it was only natural to do 20 Questions with our CD. Enjoy!

1. What are you currently up to? This is your only chance to promote your shit.
Well thank you for having me. I would like to say that I was just announced today, April 1st, and that the Sludgeaholics can currently Pre-Order me right now. Just go to this link and you’ll be all hooked up: http://www.metal-sludge.com/MetalSludgeCD.htm.

2. Now you’re actually the master CD. That means copies will be made from you, correct?
Yes, that’s correct. I’m the one and only master and I’ll be given to a duplication plant and they’ll create my offspring, not to be confused with the band The Offspring. The booklet will also be finished at that time and it’ll be all put together there. Turn around time should be a couple of weeks or so, depending on how quick the staff at Metal Sludge finish up their booklet.

3. Are there any plans for you to be on sale in stores?
Well, not right now, but Metal Sludge does have a link set up in case a mom & pop stores want to buy 5 or 10 CDs and sell them on their own. But for the most part, I’ll only be available at MetalSludge.com!

4. What hard rock/heavy metal band should give it up and call it a day?
Any band that was stupid enough not to appear on our CD.

5. Rate the following compilation CD compared to you. 1 being a something not worth picking up for a buck at a used CD store, and 10 being a CD on par with yourself.
WWE: The Anthology = 8
The NOW CDs = 0, totally unoriginal. They ripped off my cover!
We Wish You A Hairy Christmas = 2
The Osbournes Family Album = 1
Bret Michaels "A Tribute To Poison" = you’re kidding, right? Subzero.
MTV 2 Headbanger’s Ball = 5
Monster Booty = 7, because that was almost going to be the title of the Metal Sludge CD.
Chef Aid: The South Park Album = 9, almost as good as me but not quite.
Strip Jointz Rocks: Rock N Roll For Sexy Dancers = 7
Twisted Sister "Twisted Forever" = 6

6. What do you know about how this CD came to be?
From what I’ve been told, Metal Sludge has had the idea to do a CD back around 2000/2001. Not that they had any idea how to go about doing it. They were approached by Capitol Records to do a 80s metal compilation with Capitol/EMI bands, but they wouldn’t have been able to pick the songs and eventually it just didn’t happen. They were also approached a few other times by various people about saying, "I have a great idea, a Metal Sludge Cd and this is what it’ll be," but Sludge always passed on those since if they were going to do it, it was going to be on their terms. And 5 1/2 years after they started, here I am!

7. Track #12 is by a band called The Brightness. What do you know about this band and who are they? Any truth that it’s all original members of Guns N’ Roses?
Who are they? They’re The Brightness! Duh. They’re from London and they’re probably the biggest band on the CD. You’re wasting my time asking me such stupid questions. Next!

8. When did the "Hey, This Is What I Call Sludge" project officially begin and how did that happen?
Once again, I’m a fucking CD, and I wasn’t around at the time, so I can only tell you what I’ve been told. The story I heard is that Metal Sludge started asking bands on October 24, 2003, and the first band that said yes was Wednesday 13. He sent his email back the fastest. The rest of the bands basically fell in place after that.

9. How were you kept under wraps so much? Word didn’t really leak out anywhere, so in this day and age, how did the Sludgeaholic not find out about it until now?
I think it had something to do with the death threats Metal Sludge made to all the bands on the CD. They told them to keep their mouths shut and they all did. I think it was well done and would like to take this opportunity to thank the bands for playing along so well!

10. Yes or no, have you ever:
Been used as a coaster = no
Been purchased at a used CD store = no, since I’m not out yet but who would ever sell me to a used CD store? They’d have to be fucked to do that.
Skipped = never!
Smoke a joint = yes, I like to do that during the Supersuckers song.
Been thrown as a frisbee = not yet
Gone through a dishwasher = no
Been gummed by a toddler = thankfully, no!
Been used to chop up a line = perhaps, who wants to know?
Had someone finger your hole = yes, I admit it!

11. Tell us about your booklet? What’s the going to include?
The booklet is going to be in 3D and comes with a pair of 3D glasses and you can only read the credits by putting the glasses on! Actually, that’s a total lie but it sounds cool, right? If you want to know what the booklet is going to have, buy the CD. Maybe it’ll have nude photos of Britney Spears or maybe it’ll have winning lottery numbers. But I can’t reveal everything to you. Don’t be a mooch, go buy it and find out.

12. What rock star deserves a smack in the mouth and why?
I shouldn’t give them any time but I’d say SR-71. They were supposed to be a part of the CD with their song "Axl Rose" but at the 11th hour, they backed out because they got new management who felt that in order to get a new record deal, they needed to hold onto that song instead of keeping their name out there and giving the fans something to have before they put out a new CD, providing they ever get another deal. And yes, that was a run-on sentence. The band "really wanted to do it" but blamed it on their management. It also might have to do with Pain For Pleasure being on the CD and we all know that SR-71 are greatly intimidated by Pain For Pleasure. I think that has more to do with it but who am I to gossip? I’m just a CD. Anyway, it’s their loss. Back to obscurity.

13. Why Pre-Orders?
Why does Kiss still have any fans left? How the hell do I know? I’m a fucking CD! I guess the staff at Metal Sludge wanted to announce this before they had the product in hand. It makes sense to me.

14. Ok, there had to be some drama getting all these bands to be on one CD. Any egos, stupid demands, etc?
As much as I’d like to dish out a good story, the answer is no. All the bands were really easy to deal with. Some were slower than others, but they were all really cool and into it. Even the bands on the big labels like Pain For Pleasure on Island/Def Jam and Bowling For Soup on Jive Records were easy. Of course when you deal with the bigger labels, you have to deal with more people but there wasn’t any drama to speak of.

15. Which do you prefer and why?
Being shelved or being played until worn out = The Metal Sludge "Hey, This Is What I Call Sludge" CD will never be worn out!
Used CD stores or eBay = Used CD stores scare me. I like Ebay. I feel safer, but that’s just me.
Catalog numbers or bar codes = Bar codes are more professional.
Stapled booklets or fold-out panels = Funny you should ask, I was just thinking about that today. I think I’m going to go with fold-out panels!
Cassette tapes or 8-tracks = I prefer laser discs, actually.
Thermal Printing or Dye Sublimation = Would you rather be branded or tattooed? Think about it.
Kazaa or Napster = Both before my time, but from what I heard, Napster was better. Right now I think Win-MX is better than Kazaa, but I hate burned CDs. They’re fucking bastards.
Being ripped at 128Kbps or 256Kbps = Neither, 360Kbps all the way!
Black CD trays or see-through CD trays = See-through CD trays, just so long as the picture under the see-through tray is worth looking at.

16. Why don’t you come with a CD-Rom like so many other CDs?
Because I don’t need gimmicks to be a success. 20 fucking bands, 4 skits, and over 74 minutes of music is more than enough, don’t you think? You’re a greedy prick, aren’t you? Don’t waste my time with such stupid questions.

17. How was it working with Metal Skool?
They were great and in from the start. They’re sorta the hosts for the CD and they do a nice job. They start off the CD and they close the CD. It’s all comes full circle, kinda like watching The Lion King. It’s the circle of life.

18. Was announcing the CD on April Fool’s Day always part of the plan?
Yes, the staff at Metal Sludge is well thought out for being a bunch of idiots. Despite the fact they have limited HTML skills and mediocre IQ’s, they pre-plan things out extremely well and I’m happy to be in the family.

19. Is this by far the stupidest 20 Questions we’ve ever done?
Yes, I’d say so.

20. Time for Metal Sludge’s Word Association. We mention a name and you give us your thoughts.
CD-R = whores!
The Thornbirds = Elephants & Tangerines
Rainbows & Witches = the best intro ever!
The Parental Advisory Label = I look at it as my friend.
Cut-out bins = sad
The RIAA = a giant pain in the ass, but I guess they look after us CDs, so I understand where they are coming from.
Sam Goody = If you’re a CD in Sam Goody, you’ve made it, even if you do cost $6 more than you should.
Jewel Cases = without them I’m naked!
Sebastian Bach = not good enough for the Metal Sludge CD!
Bastard Boy Floyd = A & R for Metal Sludge Records

Great, what an awesome interview!

For more info on "Hey, That’s What I Call Sludge, Volume 1" you can visit www.metal-sludge.com/MetalSludgeCD.htm.

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